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Saturday, July 19, 2008

Ray's Fear of Breasts

Ray doesn't think about women. He can't. If he does, Jesus will shit his robe.

Your words reveal that, like most normal males, you live for sexual lust. It gives your sinful heart great pleasure, and you can’t think of a life without lusting for women. However, the miracle of conversion is that God takes our wicked and perverted hearts and gives us new desires.

If Ray is saying that he feels nothing, or thinks nothing when a beautiful woman walks past him, or he overhears her talking about how horny she is...he is full of shit. Lust is natural. Ever notice that religion is all about not only controlling one's appetite for various pleasures, but also making everything good in our lives filthy? The sexual appetite is part of our makeup, if our parents didn't have it, most of us would not be here. When Ray says, "God takes our wicked and perverted hearts and gives us new desires" what he is really saying is, "When I began to believe that Jesus is watching me and will punish me horribly, my desire is now not to have to suck Satan's greasy cock for all eternity". Christian leaders try and terrify their flock about this sexual stuff. Why would god create us with such a strong desire....and then not only forbid us not to do it (until a ceremony is performed) but not even to think about doing it. There is the definition of a dictator...thought crime. 1984 writ large.

You are forgetting Who it was made women in the first place. It was God.

Oh yeah, the rib woman...an afterthought. You should be flattered, ladies. Your aggressively male deity wouldn't have made you...but, alas, Adam was bored. How did God think Adam was going to reproduce??? Stupid story.

What you see in the beauty of a woman isn’t a glorified primate.

When I met my wife, I was taken by her stunning bipedal walk and opposable thumbs; she was not just any ape. She could sling feces with the best of them. I mean, why would anyone-who isn't a primatologist-view a woman as a "glorified primate", as if the atheists out here view women this way. If anything, it is the devoitly religious who view women as animals rather than equals.

As Christians, we are still tempted by the pleasure of lust, but we now know better. We now know that God sees lust as adultery, and He warns that those who give themselves to sexual perversion (lust) will end up in Hell. When a sinner is born again, God washes away all of his sins. He is forgiven every perverted sexual thought and granted the gift of eternal life. What a fool he would be to give up his eternal salvation (eternal life) for the fleeting pleasures of lust.

Thought-crime. Not only that, but you are forced into believing something. How can this be? Raytractors, I command you to believe that Santa Claus is real. Not only that, but I can read your minds, so I will know if you do or not. If you don't I will torture you forever. What a sick little game. Poor Ray, when he sees breasts, he probably tries to remind himself that they are not objects of lust, but rather 'fat padded glands that store milk for the nourishment of the young'...so doesn't he view women as glorified primates? Maybe he doesn't look at all! Just picture Ray and Kirk screaming and running with their arms flailing when a woman approaches, "we can't lust after you" they scream in retreat!!


  1. Quick, flash your tits at Ray!

    (Man boobs too - let's not be sexist.)

  2. I think maybe Ray needs to get laid.
    It's all a form of control that thought crime. No freedom of thought= no rebellion. How can we stop human nature, natural things like being turned on or having sexual thoughts? How can something so harmless and natural be against god's law?

  3. Clos

    You fail to disappoint again.

    Great Post.

  4. RS,

    If someone would just pay me to do this all day...


    I hope Ray doesn't look upon my man-boobs with lust...yuck! How very Ted Haggard!


    Don't wish Ray to get laid...his god will burn him. What Ray needs to get involved with is the pharmaceutical industry so that everyone can be chemically castrated. However, eggs and sperm will be frozen and used for procreation so that the filthy, perverted @#$ organs (too filthy to say) won't have to be seen or touched. In fact, the next step for the men among us to grow large bellies so that we won't ever have to see our own filthy appendage. This would solve so much unnecessary joy and pleasure. Who wants that stuff?

  5. Clos

    That's what kills me about all Ray's doctor analogies, isn't a doctors work kinda sinful. I mean looking upon all that ungodly nakedness can't be good for ones salvation. At least you guys can grow bellies to hide those dirty parts, what are good fundie woman suppose to do? God must really hate them, not only do we have two naughty areas, but one of them is not so easy to hide.

  6. Lance, I can resist anything except you.

    (Sorry, Kirsti.)

    My first ComfortSwill comment after our strike ends will be:

    "Ray, this is me flashing my tits at you."

    Now I have to come up with a funny euphemism for "tits" that will make it past the ChristoCensor.

  7. Wee,

    Maybe 'womanhills' 'chestflesh' 'sinfuldevilmounds'?

  8. When I met my wife, I was taken by her stunning bipedal walk and opposable thumbs; she was not just any ape. She could sling feces with the best of them.

    That was my laugh for day! You are a little ray comfort of sunshine.

  9. I think the medical term for tits is pillows.

  10. I'm with you, Wee. Lance is pretty irresistable.

    Thanks for the laugh! I needed that. =)

  11. I feel lust for all of you. Oh, Jesus just told me that's cool, he does too. They just deleted his posts from the Bible and replaced them with someone else's.
    Btw, I just entered my picture for the first time, what do you think?

  12. @ Felix

    Nice picture, I feel lust for you now too :-)


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