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Thursday, July 24, 2008

Two posts that cracked me up...


scmike said...

New Species alert---"the Ray-theist":

It seems that a new species of atheist has been discovered in the dark recesses of the internet.

This new species is characterized by a deep obsession with Ray Comfort (even going so far as to creat entire websites dedicated to bashing him). Another characteristic of this species is the ability to conceal its true colors behind "educated" sounding dialogue and "scientific" jargon.

This chameleon-like trait is effective in masking the extremely venemous and aggressive nature of this creature. However, it has been observed that exposure to the light renders this camouflage useless.

Typically dwelling in darkness, the Ray-theist will occassionally venture out to other areas in order to reproduce. Although very slow, this creature is extremely subtle and slippery, making it difficult to apprehend.

The Ray-theist is easily distinguished from its close cousin the atheist by the much larger yellow streak along its back. God Bless and Beware.


Yellow streak. Oh, scmike, I love to fight. I was in the Marine Corps for six years, and I come from a long line of shitkicker rednecks. I'd love to meet you.


Our next poet laureate:

America the beautiful,
or so you used to be.
Land of the Pilgrims' pride;
I'm glad they'll never see.

Babies piled in dumpsters,
Abortion on demand,
Oh, sweet land of liberty;
your house is on the sand.

Our children wander aimlessly
poisoned by cocaine
choosing to indulge their lusts,
when God has said abstain

From sea to shining sea,
our Nation turns away
From the teaching of God's love
and a need to always pray

We've kept God in our
temples,how callous we have grown.
When earth is but His footstool,
and Heaven is His throne.

We've voted in a government
that's rotting at the core,
Appointing Godless Judges;
who throw reason out the door,


Too soft to place a killer
in a well deserved tomb,
But brave enough to kill a baby
before he leaves the womb.

You think that God's not
angry,that our land's a moral slum?
How much longer will He wait
before His judgment comes?

How are we to face our God,
from Whom we cannot hide?
What then is left for us to do,
but stem this evil tide?

If we who are His children,
will humbly turn and pray;
Seek His holy face
and mend our evil way:

Then God will hear from Heaven;
and forgive us of our sins,
He'll heal our sickly land
and those who live within.

But, America the Beautiful,
If you don't - then you will see,
A sad but ! ! Holy God
withdraw His hand from Thee.

~~Judge Roy Moore~~

What could I possibly add?

8 comments:

  1. You have no idea what would
    causes an atheist like Stalin to murder millions of people. Maybe its his fascism. Maybe its his atheism. Maybe its both.
    - poster 'emily' at Ray's

    Yup, maybe the communist Stalin was inspired both by his fascism that told him to get rid of communists and Jews because they killed Christ, and his atheism that told him that there's no reason to believe in any god.
    Yeah, you caught us emily. We atheists love to take revenge for Christ's death because we agree with fascist communists and don't believe Christ had anything to do with God.

    Fundamentalist Christianity and a mature state of mind cannot coexist.

    ReplyDelete
  2. For twenty years I had to wear a extra thick T-shirt under my uniform to hide my yellow streak.


    Sheesh, what a fuckin tool!
    Oh, and how do you feel about an abortion? HMMMM?

    ReplyDelete
  3. scmike said...
    New Species alert---"the Ray-theist":

    It seems that a new species of atheist has been discovered in the dark recesses of the internet.

    -------------------------------

    SCMike,

    That was a brilliant piece of work. To bad you didn't write it. Nonetheless, I leave it open to the commenters to deal with you.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Give SCMIke credit for one thing. He finally managed to compose one post without using his "Argue like Sye TenB" crib notes.

    At least that was mildly amusing. Keep it up Mike. Your lame attempts to be like your idol Sye are kind of pathetic.

    ReplyDelete
  5. New species? Nonsense. Come now, SCMike, don't you recognize a new church when you see one?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Sigh....at least we had the sense to soundly defeat his bid for governor of Alabama.

    Alabama
    Judge

    Some of you may be wondering what Judge Roy Moore has been doing since he was removed from the bench for refusing to remove the Ten Commandments from his courtroom wall.
    Judge Moore was sued by the ACLU for displaying the Ten Commandments in his courtroom foyer. He has been stripped of his judgeship and now they are trying to strip his right to practice law in Alabama !

    ReplyDelete
  7. I heard Moore now goes on tour towing his 10 commandments with his pickup truck. Fundietards gather to pay and get their picture taken with it. Maybe Ray well come up with similar scam - get your pic taken with a real live crocoduck!

    Btw, what the fuck was so great about the pilgrims. They sucked. They were a bunch of brutal theocrats.

    ReplyDelete
  8. nafa,
    I really don't think they sucked much. Turkey grease maybe.

    ReplyDelete

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