Raytractorism

I can't believe this wasn't thought of already...

The Religion of Raytractorism (note capitalization)

Pope: MacGyver Jr
Bishops: Can't be arsed to list them all. Just look in the list of contributors...
Holy City: Blogger, Google, The Internet, Earth
Creed: "Ray Comfort is a cunt mouth lying sac of shit." (thanks to dale)
Holy Book: That one which Ray is writing and wanted our help with atheism on...*free copy w00t!*
Fellowship: Rational minds
Faith: The belief that our knowledge of Ray Comfort's ignorance in everything is correct (which it is).
Agenda: To debunk Ray Comfort, deconvert his followers, bankrupt Living Waters, and preside over the gay marriage of Ray and Kirk.
Moral Code: If Ray Comfort agrees with it, you can be pretty sure it's immoral.
Language: Skeptish
National Holiday: Every fucking day.

The Democratic Faith

Since Dave stole my entry for Raylianism and Kaitlyn stole my entry for Republican Religion (which you should have a look at), I, being the godless conservative that I am, submit the Democratic Faith: (Odd that I didn't think of it before Republicans.)

Firstly, it qualifies for Ray's definition of religion as it is a cause "pursued with zeal." And luckily mine was already capitalized (as it is, indeed, a religion).

Finally, it has the necessary aspects of the religion:

Pope: B. Hussein Obama (Satan)
Bishops: Bill Maher, John Stewart, Larry Flynt, Bill Clinton
Holy City: San Diego, CA (in the southern gay district)
Creed: Fetusus above people.
Holy book: An Inconvenient Truth
Fellowship: Blue Staters
Faith: People are too incompetent to manage their own lives and money
Agenda: Destroy America
Moral Code: Whatever Osama Bin Laden says
Language: Arabic disguised as English
National Holiday: October 31

First Raytractor Contest

Well, Ray seems persistent with this nonsensical stream of posts on how atheism is a religion. Instead of responding further to this, I have a challenge for the Raytractors to post in this blog or in their own blogs:

Using Ray's definition, show how some cause, principle, or activity is a religion:

It’s interesting to note that one definition of religion is:

"A cause, principle, or activity pursued with zeal or conscientious devotion."

That rightly describes the ardent atheist cause. Despite protests to the contrary by its faithful adherents, atheism is a form of religion.

And remember, like Ray, you have to arbitrarily capitalize whatever you are addressing, regardless of the grammatical incorrectness of it:

Atheists may not like it, but even though they do not believe that they owe allegiance to God, like Buddhism, Atheism (note the capitalization) is a religion and those that adhere to its beliefs are "religious."

So, if yours is on stamp collecting, be sure to make it Stamp Collecting, and then make a reference to note the capitalization.

Finally, define the various aspects of the religion:

Pope: Charles Darwin
Bishops: Richard Dawkins • Daniel Dennett • Sam Harris • Christopher Hitchens
Holy City: Oxford, England
Creed: Darwinian evolution
Holy book: Origin of Species
Fellowship: Universal
Faith: The belief that there is no God
Agenda: The stop the advance of Christianity
Moral Code: Societal dictates
Language: Speculation
National Holiday: April 1st.

Just as a note, don't be afraid to misconstrue or redefine whatever you are addressing to make it fit, like Ray did with atheism:

Although many flinch at the thought that they have faith in anything, they believe that there’s no God, and even have "works" to confirm it.

I shall submit mine at a later time :-)

P.S. I'm rather interested to see Kaitlyn's submission ;)