I can smell a second strike coming...

Hey,

With all that's going on over at AC recently - particularly the excommunication of Terry - I get the feeling that there are a lot of folk who are plain fed up with Ray (and not just in the usual "oh that Ray Comfort, look at him being a twat again; bless his little cotton Jesus-socks" kind of way).  Maybe I'm reading this wrong, but I think the air is right to invite some of the newly emerging lurkers and general theists that have cropped up since the Pity Party over here for some serious chat and tell Ray to stick it where the circling-Sun don't shine.

If I'm way off base with this, let me know and I'll Winston Smith this post so fast the Cambrian explosion will look like an epoch (oh, wait...)

I know many of us don't post there any more, regardless, but I think we could draw some new blood in anyhow. Thoughts?

In related news,

A poster by the illuminating name of 'Anonymous' wrote a comment on our friend Terry's post Beware of "Wolves in Sheep's Clothing"  and said, among other things:

"The atheists are the fools, and they will embrace you because "an enemy of my enemy is my friend"...

...By your actions you are a false convert. You really need to let that sink in, but not let it blow you up, your rage is very ungodly....

...By going around and slandering LW for rebuking you, you are acting like a fool, instead of being wise and examining yourself to see whether you are indeed "in the faith"."

So we've got;

1. The 'others' are evil and fools, don't trust them
2. You're not toeing the line and therefore you were never one of 'us' to begin with
3. Do not question the leadership

Cult?

Yeah, I'd say it's a fucking cult.

I think this post lends credence to the idea that Ray - or at least one of his minions - posts under false profiles to up the comment count and generally antagonize people, I have one thing to say to that:

Costly mistakes it seems Ray is making,

Ugly scenes with the fans he's forsaking. 

Not able enough,

To rebuke or rebuff,

So he makes out like they were just faking.

Ok, Wee does it much, much better, but I still had fun writing it.

There's been some cracking stuff done while I've been away - it's taken me a while to catch up - so a massive thanks to all the Raytractors who have provided such entertaining reading over the past week or so, so good job all! Now lets steal Ray's readership and get some proper discussion on the go...

Matt

Weemaryanne Regrets (But Not Very Much)

(Note: All puns and innuendo intended unless accompanied by disclaimers.)

Believe it or not, Ray, I'd miss you.

(Insert pause while searching for tissue.)

But, the old intertoobs

Have no shortage of boobs

Spouting nonsense about this non-issue.

Invitation to Ray's Pity Party

And Now We Are Forty

Cheerfully swiped from The Acts of the Apostles, Chapter 2 (New International Version).  Weemaryanne's improvements (?) appear in brackets [thus-like].

 1When the day of Pentecost came, they [The Raytractors] were all together in one [unholy] place. 2Suddenly a sound like the blowing of a violent wind [or possibly a Burtonfart] came from heaven and filled the whole house where they were sitting. [And lo, the stench was profound. Verily.]

3They saw what seemed to be tongues of fire that separated and came to rest on each of them. [And they promptly rose and poured beer one upon the other, forinasmuchas the alcohol content thereof is low enough that the liquid may extinguish flames.

And then they did lament, for verily, it was Lance C. Johnson's homebrew which was poured out upon the furniture.]

4All of them were filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other tongues as the Spirit enabled them. [And the most energetic amongst them made multiple thoughtful and eloquent blog posts, and Weemaryanne spoke in Doggerel, and the rest endured Weemaryanne's doggerel with the bestest of good grace.] 

 5Now there were staying in Jerusalem God-fearing Jews from every nation under heaven. 6When they heard this sound, a crowd came together in bewilderment, because each one heard them speaking in his own language. 7Utterly amazed, they asked: "Are not all these men  who are speaking Galileans? [Why, no, and they're not all men either, dumbass.]

8Then how is it that each of us hears them in his own native language? 9Parthians, Medes and Elamites; residents of Mesopotamia, Judea and Cappadocia, Pontus and Asia, 10Phrygia and Pamphylia, Egypt and the parts of Libya near Cyrene; visitors from Rome 11 (both Jews and converts to Judaism); Cretans and Arabs-we hear them declaring the wonders of God in our own tongues!" 12Amazed and perplexed, they asked one another, "What does this mean?"

[And MacGyver Jr. replied, "Who the heck knoweth? But if thou hast a suggestion, then verily, thou shouldst become a Raytractor and get in thy two cents' worth."]

 13Some, however, made fun of them and said, "They have had too much wine." [Which seemeth unlikely, as had they been drinking wine when the flying fire arrived then the place would have gone up in a great conflagration, yea verily youbetcha.]

(Courtesy of biblegateway.com)

-----------------------------

Seeing as there are now forty of us, and the number forty keeps popping up in the Bible (probably just a mnemonic device, a holdover from the days before the bible was written down), I had the idea to write some doggerel featuring the names of each and every one of The Raytractors.  

Then I realized I was feverish.  So, instead, I swiped someone else's non-copyright doggerel and took shameless liberties with it. 

Then I took some aspirin and now I'm going to go lie down. Any malaise that can cause symptoms like that should not be trifled with.

'Tis a Puzzlement

Why would God (Ultimate Insider),

Be opaque, or choose to hide, or

Wish to conceal

What may be revealed

By CERN's new Large Hadron Collider?

***************

(blush)  Eh, that one's not too awful.  

I'm currently trying to write a limerickal expression of my forbidden love for Dr. Stephen Cox, a perfectly adorable young man who works on the LHC.  You may encourage me in this dreadful habit by suggesting rhymes for:

• boson
• subatomic
• particle
• discovery

Many thanks,

Wee

Danger, Silentdave! Danger, Silentdave!

If the Bible is really inerrant

As we're told, then your Questions may warrant

Retribution divine -- 

The infinite kind -- 

A prospect that's truly abhorrent.

My Contribution to Lance's Catch-Up List

The Prophet's Profit

My cap, I am now forced to doff it,
And bite my tongue rather than scoff. It
Seems Living Waters
Feeds Ray’s sons and daughters.
Who knew it would turn such a profit?

(Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I've already got this in the comments on one of aceofclubz' excellent posts.  So sue me.)

FAIL

In His workshop, the Almighty Lord

's latest effort no joy will afford.

He stares: "What the heck?! --

I've omitted the neck!

(Sigh.)  Back to the old drawing board."

PZ: "The Great Desecration...it is finished."

Over at Pharyngula, PZ Myers relates in gory detail how he has followed through on his nefarious plot to desecrate a consecrated communion wafer, a copy of the Qur'an, and a third, mystery entry.

The mystery entry turned out to be a copy of The God Delusion. Excerpt follows:

I know some of you have proposed intricate plans for how to do horrible things to these crackers, but I repeat…it's just a cracker. I wasn't going to make any major investment of time, money, or effort in treating these dabs of unpleasantness as they deserve, because all they deserve is casual disposal. However, inspired by an old woodcut of Jews stabbing the host, I thought of a simple, quick thing to do: I pierced it with a rusty nail (I hope Jesus's tetanus shots are up to date). And then I simply threw it in the trash, followed by the classic, decorative items of trash cans everywhere, old coffeegrounds and a banana peel. My apologies to those who hoped for more, but the worst I can do is show my unconcerned contempt.

By the way, I didn't want to single out just the cracker, so I nailed it to a few ripped-out pages from the Qur'an and The God Delusion. They are just paper. Nothing must be held sacred. Question everything. God is not great, Jesus is not your lord, you are not disciples of any charismatic prophet. You are all human beings who must make your way through your life by thinking and learning, and you have the job of advancing humanities' knowledge by winnowing out the errors of past generations and finding deeper understanding of reality. You will not find wisdom in rituals and sacraments and dogma, which build only self-satisfied ignorance, but you can find truth by looking at your world with fresh eyes and a questioning mind.

The post on Pharyngula is only 1/2 hour old, but there are already 150+ comments. If PZ was looking to send a message, I'd say he succeeded.

The Doggerel Song

It's doggerel! It's doggerel!
(Er, please ignore that funny smell.)
When ice skates go on sale in hell,
We'll all be swapping doggerel!

When Montague wed Capulet
Was it a sin? -- Oh, yeah, you bet.
"My error," quoth fair Juliet
"Is one which I cannot regret."
(Chorus: It's doggerel, it's doggerel, etc.)

When Ezekiel wrote his prophecy
The critics wondered privately,
"Ye gods, what sort of devilry
Made verse twenty of chapter twenty-three?"
(repeat Chorus)

A Comfortable trade he plied;
His message travelled far and wide,
With Friend Intangible at his side.
It's just a shame the preacher lied.
(repeat Chorus)

A houseboat in the Florida Keys
Hosts Terry's personalities,
Whose favorite computer keys
Are Ctrl-As, Ctrl-Cs, and Ctrl-Vs.
(repeat Chorus)

Evolutionary biologist
Put fundergarments in a twist;
Since placed upon the banished list,
Clostridiophile, you're greatly missed.
(repeat Chorus)

To Irukandji, Flinging Dust,
And other friends of fragile trust
Forever wrecked, I finally must
Admit it: This-here poem's a bust.

Final Chorus:

It's doggerel, it's doggerel!
(Oh, can't we fix that horrid smell?!)
If you ain't feelin' 'zackly swell,
You just don't 'preciate doggerel!

------------
Dedicated to the Comfort blog regulars who inspired me. You know who you are. And in one case, who you aren't. -- Signed, Weemaryanne

(Reposted here because a poet's friends MUST listen to his crap, even if they've heard it before. It's a rule.)

Welcome to the Club

Our group blog is called The Raytractors.

Our members’ intelligence factors
May be through the roof --
Which is nice, but ain’t proof
That there is some Intangible Actor

With puissance and glory to spare
Who fashioned the cosmos with care.

-- Since my time isn’t billable
As I run short of syllables,
I’m gonna stop when I come to – right there.

;-)